A Multitasking Parody

This post is not coming totally out of left field. Almost, but not totally. I happened to catch an article knocking multitasking. And don’t feel bad if you don't catch the humor here... like straight off the bat. Unless I'm reading I rarely catch humor. I'm sure I've mentioned it before, how I usually catch the rift in jokes fifteen minutes (or more) after the joke's been told. Most times it's more... like days, weeks, or even months after the joke was first told. I mull all the time over these parodies I miss. Maybe I should share what happened the first time I was recruited to play on a softball team so things would be real clear. I haven't been recruited to play softball since. 

Now, you might wonder why won't I just ask, "hey, ...ugh, would you mind explaining the joke to me?" Something like I tried to do when everyone was so sure I understood how to play softball. Like, how hard could that be? But then just like what happened then, you'd think I was trying to be funny if I asked for clarity, when nothing could be further from the truth.

It may sound awkward, actually it is awkward, but for some of us the simplest matters are sometimes the most difficult to grasp. And whoooaaa... before we get to aligning this awkwardness with something more complex... like figuring out how to get to East Africa (from PA in the USA) without a compass, guide, or transportation, let's work on this little hum-dinger right away.

I CAN figure out how to get to East Africa (from PA in the USA) without a compass, guide, or transportation. But it has nothing to do with complex strategizing, or perhaps maybe... over-thinking?

Strategic juggling, or for the sake of simplicity, multitasking is how I wind up handling feats that might look complex. And despite that rumor I panned by, stating how multitasking doesn't produce great results, I beg to differ.

Has anyone ever seen a juggler?

Okay, so let's take the juggler who throws one ball up in the air and catches it. Zzzzzzzzz-snore, boring!

But what if the juggler throws two balls up in the air and catches both. Mmm... a little better, especially if the juggler doesn't make it look cumbersome… like a struggle.

Three balls up in the air and we got us a little show. Here’s a dollar for your trouble.

Four balls and the juggler's chair, and Whoa! Now I'm impressed! I'll pull up a chair myself.

Four balls, the chair, and the juggler tap-dancing while juggling... oh baby... don't go nowhere! Everyone might have his or her thing they do well, but don't hate the juggler over here.

...cause four balls, the chair, tap-dancing, singing, palm reading, balancing two baby elephants on each shoulder, a wild cat on its back, and birthing a juggler a juggle... oh come on now, don't tell me this juggler ain't juggling!

Philosophize it whatever way that helps you feel better. Or nitpick your way over to the next show (details to follow); either you're multitasking or you're not. This isn't science or math, or a circuitous rickety pebbledash. Straight up one-on-one logic is speaking here. 

No words can denounce a multitasking juggler juggling like this. Even if nothing else ever happens, just imagining something like this is enough of a show. I'm saying, Get Your Tickets! Get Your Tickets! for the MULTITASKING PARODY SHOW!


  1. For someone like me who has the attention span of a nat, multitasking isn't a lifestyle it's a lifeline

  2. it's funny you mention it's a lifeline because I'm starting to feel the same way. One project and I drag like molasses; but a dozen things going at once and energy rushes at me out of nowhere


Post a Comment