Deliberating Change

One of my biggest, and I’m just going to go on and call it ‘a hang-up’, is deliberating change. You might know what I’m talking about… something like heading off for that first class in a brand new semester. You know how it goes, or how it went; last year ending in disaster, barely passing your classes. So now this semester, this year you swear to change that. Of course anyone who knows me however, knows exactly how I fare with such a change.

     Yep, I start out strong…strong being the first voice telling me I’m going to do better, going to vigorously take class notes, stick toothpicks between my eyelids if I have to, cross referencing every topic discussed during lectures. Wasn’t nothing getting by me. The instructor, or professor, or teacher was going to have to prove to me why I didn’t deserve the “A”.

     But then again, there’s me and the first day. You know it, something inevitably comes up, usually something that started at home or on the way to class, where I arrive in class, assuredly late, taking a seat with thoughts in a far out space, doodling and daydreaming, waking up in just enough time to hear the instructor telling the class it’s a good time for a break. When we return we’re going to talk more about ‘asymmetric failure’, to which there’s me again, rubbing my eyes and squinting trying to read the class syllabus to see if I’m even in the right class!

     The point is, I’m like the next person determined to tackle change for the better. Like OEBooks Book Blog. Could I make it a little more consistent? ...Or should I make it a little more consistent? Perhaps I could go for dramatic and do a dress up a lot more drastic? A few times within the year OEBooks Blog has been up I’ve had these thoughts. Each time I ultimately settle on a prodding that goads me in nearly every decision I make. 

“Follow your conscience and trust your heart,” the pulse that drives OEBooks Book Blog.